Lies and Excuses

I heard a story about a pastor who was walking down the street and came upon a group of boys, all between the ages of 10 and 12. They were standing around a dog, and the minister thought they might be planning to hurt it. So the reverend yelled out, “What are you doing to that dog?”

One of the boys said, “He’s just a stray dog from our neighborhood and we all want him, but only one of us can take him home. So, we decided whoever tells the biggest lie gets to keep the dog!”

The pastor was incensed, and launched into a 10-minute message against lying. He ended by saying, “Don’t you boys know it’s a sin to tell a lie? Why, when I was your age, I never told a lie!” The boys looked at each other for a moment and said, “Alright, give him the dog!”

Fact is, lying and deception begin very early in life. The six-month-old, before he can even speak, learns how to engage in fake crying. It’s all downhill from there. Then, as we get older, we learn the “fine art of excuse-making.”

What’s the difference between a lie and an excuse? Answer: not much. An excuse is “the skin of a reason stuffed with a lie” or “a lie dressed up for dinner.” In other words, an excuse is just a fancy lie.

An excuse is really a lack of desire (in contrast to a reason). Excuses are what we offer instead of reasons. When you don’t really want to do something, you make an excuse. It’s been said, “He who excuses himself accuses himself. The bottom line is, we know excuses when we hear them.

Excuses only satisfy the people who make them. We have all heard them: My dog ate my homework. Sorry I’m late, but my alarm didn’t go off! The check is in the mail. Lying, deception, and giving excuses have become far too common. Studies show that most resumes are full of misrepresentations:

71% increase tenures of previous jobs.
64% exaggerate accomplishments.
60% overstate the size of the departments managed.
53% cite partial degrees as full.
48% inflate salary history.

Studies also show that one quarter to one third of all workers tell lies to explain their tardiness or absence. An article in USA Today dealt with this penchant we have for making excuses. It pointed out that “each of us fibs at least 50 times a day.” We lie about our age, our income, or our accomplishments. And we use lies to escape embarrassment.

According to the book Excuses and Lies, the top lies are:

• “I’ll be ready in a minute!” (Girls may say this more.)
• “I’ll do it in a minute.” (Guys probably say this more.)
• “Of course I’m listening!” (Probably a guy saying it to a girl.)
• “Nothing’s wrong!”
• And finally, “Yes, dear!”

Add to this some other lies we may tell:

• “You look great” (when they don’t).
• “But we can still be good friends.”
• “She means nothing to me!”
• “I’m from your government, and I am here to help you.”

Then there are excuses. We’ve all heard and used them at one time or another. And most of the time, they are not even creative! George Washington said, “It is better to offer no excuse than a bad one.”

Since man’s beginning in the Garden, he has made excuses. The first excuse was made by Adam: “It was the woman You gave me!” The second was made by Eve: “The serpent beguiled me.”

Have you been hiding behind lies and excuses lately?