We Need to Talk

In a survey of divorced couples, 83 percent said the failure of the marriage was because of deficient communication.

Communication is one of the keys to a successful marriage. It means you have to talk a lot with each other. You need to spend time together and take time off together from all the things you’re involved in and share what’s on your heart.

That’s why it’s so important for the words leave and cleave to be operative throughout a marriage. First, you leave all other relationships and make your marital bond your most important. Then you constantly cleave . . . constantly grow . . . constantly love . . . constantly express your love to one another.

It is as simple as telling your spouse that you love him or her. When is the last time you said to your wife, “I love you,” or said to your husband, “I love you. I appreciate you”? Even a hug can go a long way.

I believe a breakdown in communication will lead to selfishness, which can ultimately lead to the breakdown of a marriage. Don’t marry someone if you think you will fix them. They probably will get worse. You need to accept them and love them as they are. If you are not willing to do that, then you have a problem. It’s called selfishness.

Rather than going into your marriage saying, “How are you going to fulfill me? How are you going to meet my needs? What are you going to do for me?” you should be asking, “How can I fulfill you? How can I meet your needs?”

Put the needs of your spouse before your own. Most importantly, put God first in all things. When you do this, everyone will be blessed as a result.